I’ve always worn my heart on my sleeve. I have so much love to give. But recently, I’ve been finding myself again & working on me. Which has led me back to love – time & time again. I realized I have always given it so freely, and expect that same love back. I realize I’m not the easiest person to love. But who really is? Nobody is perfect.
The truth is, you have to work each and every single day with your partner. It’s not easy. That is something I have been struggling with personally for some time. You may not always see eye to eye on some things. And that’s okay!
But you have to remember – your feelings are relevant!! Don’t ever let someone tell you that the way you FEEL is wrong. We aren’t on this planet for someone to tell us the way feel isn’t okay, or isn’t enough.
One thing I’ve struggled with in just about every relationship I’ve ever been in is arguments. I’m learning that they’re not always a bad thing. I’m not talking about the messy, screaming & yelling types of arguments. Those aren’t healthy. I’m talking more along the lines of disagreements. Instead of arguing back and forth for no real reason, learn to work through the issues. I am so bad about bottling up and just putting how I feel aside just to extinguish the fight. Explain how you feel & why you feel that way! Stand up for yourself and your feelings!
Over the last few weeks I’ve been silent, emotional, sad, happy & confused. I felt like giving up on everything. Like I wasn’t good enough or loved enough. This is where you have to communicate with your significant other, not bottle up and get quiet. They don’t always know what’s going on in your mind! For me, that was absolutely true. I had been so quiet for so long that I almost forgot how to communicate at all- good or bad! I am one to get VERY quiet when I get upset. I tend to push people away once I feel unloved or unwanted or even unappreciated- even if that’s not even actually what is going on. I start giving up & distancing myself. That’s not healthy! I truly believe you need to face your issues head on, and work them out. I’m learning how to do this better every single day.
If you’ve ever felt lonely, unwanted, or even unappreciated- I encourage you to just speak up! Talk to your partner! Tell them what’s going on in that jumbled up mind of yours. And really LISTEN to what they have to say. If they support you, they’re going to appreciate you coming to them & wanting to work on things. You don’t have to feel alone in your relationship. Just talking has helped us so much, even in the last week.
Also, another thing I recommend is definitely getting in touch with your love languages. You and your partner should both take this & share your results! Go over them together and even talk it out! If you’ve never taken the love languages quiz, you totally should! It’s free and it really gives you some insight on yourself and your partner’s wants and needs! Check it out!
It’s okay to fall apart, but if the pieces aren’t going back together right – you may want to reconsider your relationship! Don’t just stay because it’s comfortable, truly work on things! & if your partner isn’t willing to put in the work then was it ever really worth it?
Bottom line, if you’re not happy- WORK ON IT! Talk it out. You may be surprised where it gets you. It has given me a second chance at a healthy relationship with my man.
And ladies, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here! I’d love to connect and just chat! We all need someone we can count on, someone that understands us & the way we thing. Because let’s face it, our brains work completely different than our man’s brain!